During high school, I was taught by my biology teacher to not have sex because it would lead to horrible horrible diseases that would make my genitalia look like a mushroom farm. At least, that’s what the pictures that he showed right before our lunch period implied. I’m writing this during lunch. It’s making me not want to eat. And to this day, my genitalia becoming like those pictures is what I fear most from a sexual experience. And babies. So I’ve developed an easy system of protecting myself.
It should be noted that the best way to protect one’s self from STIs and funny smells in and around your penis/vagina area is ABSTINENCE. If you don’t have sex, it’s really really really difficult to get Sexually Transmitted Infections. Not impossible, but überdifficult. Staying away from dirty needles helps too.
Okay, so that system is tripartite, or — for those who like small words — in three parts:
1) Be Selective. Find someone to have sex with that you know. You should probably be attracted to them. You should be comfortable enough to ask them silly but crucial questions like “do you have the clap?” And you should ask those questions.
2) Be Safe. Wear a condom. Birth control pills don't protect against disease, and if you aren't having heterosexual sex they don't really apply anyway. If there is no penetration occurring, use a dental dam. Which could just be a modified condom.
3) Be Smart. Get tested every six months. If you're in a relationship, make sure your partner(s) is/are tested. Do it. There are 132 free or cheap STD Testing sites in the state of Tennessee (eg. here and here). It's also offered at Health Services (x1270) (but I have a healthy distrust of the system, so I get checked in my hometown). It's confidential and TennCare will pay for it if you're a resident of Tennessee.
Follow these steps, and you'll be a cleaner better lover.
Tip #7:
Sex is a natural anti-histamine. So if you and your partner are both sick (i.e. can't give each other what you both already have) have sex, you'll breathe better.
Also, to the music thing from a couple posts ago: Jamiroquai solves all problems.
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antihistamines only treat allergies, not infectious illnesses. so if it is going to have any benefit, it is because you both have allergies (and thus, are incapable of giving each other your "sickness"). however, if you have a cold, sinus infection, etc, its antihistamine properties will not do you any good.
ReplyDeletehowever, i was once told it was (ironically) the best cure for a headache. perhaps you could write a piece on the beneficial side effects of sex.